Reblog if you're willing to answer publicly...
omg my first booty call request from a sober...
butt touch number negotioable
get me blackbird before it closes and I will give you anywhere from 100-all of the butt touches
I will give 100 butt touches to anyone who wants...
you can tell my brother is depressed when all of his facebook statuses are really happy and optimistic
Jesus christ my body feels like I am falling apart
i had these odd scratches on my tit and i freaked out cause i didn’t know where they were from and then i realized they’re probably from when i fashioned a bra out of tinfoil today in class.
this dude in my studio says “bullshit” a lot but he always says “boo-shit” and it’s really funny and I want to laugh every time they are having a serious moment
Louis C.K.'s deconstruction on why farts are funny
1. It comes out of your butthole. 2. It smells like poop because it’s been hanging out next to it for a long time. 3. And it makes a little trumpet noise when it comes out.
i say things out loud in classes that i think are funny they are never ever funny no one ever laughs maybe i should just start farting loudly
Torcetti the fungus cake pig– A recipe title on a spanish vegan blog, translated by google into english
i don't know what to do now that i have finished...
….what do I do now?
things that are awesome about eating a lot of...
you get to stay hydrated cause you drink so much water you get to feel like a total badass you get to love life you get to feel the pleasure of sweat dripping down your face you get to have a better life than those who do not enjoy spicy foods
I've been measuring time this past week in...
“How long til I have to go to class? Three episodes? Sweet”
things I love
how the cheap-ass sushi bar near my school plays 90s pop ballads how cheap-ass sushi bars only charge three bucks for a huge ass vegetable roll how I can mooch off of starbucks’ free wifi in here
lotus-eyes: oh and also there is something called driving etiquette and that includes not honking at girls walking on the street I hate everyone
finish this episode of spongebob walk to vocal technique class pick up a huge bag of tater chips on the way there become a fatty mcfat conspire with boyfriend’s roomate to help her school him in their ongoing prank war
I had a dream last night where all of my...
…I dunno what to think about this…
you know you're tired when
you can’t get up the energy to make pasta i really want pasta. someone come deliver me pasta brb following the tumblr tag for pasta
Lolol taking the shuttle home cause I don't want...
Love my classy ass city
I always have dreams where my boyfriend’s music becomes really popular at my school and everyone sings that shit in the hallways and plays it at parties and everyone is like “omg he’s so dreamy” and I’m like LOL I touch his weiner sometimes